Introvert Holiday Nightmare Going To a Party and Networking - Introvert Whisperer

Introvert Whisperer / Introvert Holiday Nightmare Going To a Party and Networking - Introvert Whisperer Introvert Holiday Nightmare: Going To a Party and Networking If you’re like me, there is a turmoil that churns inside you as the holidays draw near.   You do want to be wanted and a party invitation is certainly a sign that someone finds you desirable to be around.   On the other hand, you regret agreeing to go shortly after you responded.   It tends to only get worse as the day draws near. What sounded like a good idea a few weeks ago sounds like a bad idea now.   It’s how we roll. Despite the various arguments your mind wages on going or not going, let me share with you a few of things I’ve learned to take the dread out of it for you. - Focus on a strategy â€" Yes, it sounds strange to think of a party like a strategy but there is some introvert goodness in doing this.   Part of the dread of going to a party is the energy consumption of meeting new people and talking (or listening).   It’s too easy to allow yourself to sit and listen endlessly for hours.   Some of that are ok but too much is a soul sucking.   I have found a good strategy is to focus on 1 or may be 2 people at a time and to stay focused on them for a while.   Introverts prefer relationships one-on-one, so go with what you do best.       Another part of my strategy is to try to meet a couple of new people and get to know them more than the usual superficial party level.   The good thing about focusing on a strategy is that it replaces the voice in your head telling you to stay home. - Find one thing to look forward to â€" If you give it some thought, you can find a few high points to going to the party.   You might think of more.   Perhaps its getting to see someone you don’t see too often and this will allow you some catch-up time.   If that isn’t it, it could be the opportunity to wear something special or the location.   We once went to the party that was held before a musical.   I knew we wouldn’t know anyone that would be there, but I was looking forward to the stage event.   When you have something positive to think about, use that to replace your negative party-talk. - Set boundaries â€" If you have to, you could decide to go but only for a specific amount of time.   That way, you aren’t a flaky “no-show” to the host and you can go with the knowledge that you have a cutoff point.   Another tactic is to set boundaries on people who talk too much.   We are great listeners but when you’re around someone who talks too much and cares too little about your life because they are only talking about them, it stops being fun. Know your limits and disengage. - Volunteer â€" Call your host and see if you can help them with setting up the party or running to get supplies.   You’ll be appreciated and also feel a greater investment in the event. - Define your attitude â€" You can choose to think about going to a party however you want.   Look at the party as an opportunity to meet a new friend or tighten relationships with people you already know.   Make a choice to not be a party pooper â€" before the party.   There must be some good reason someone thought enough of you to invite you to their event.   Capture that good spirit and use it. I think it’s important to participate in the things people invite you to.   I know not all of my fellow “innies” shares that perspective.   But, in my mind it goes something like this:   If you turn someone down enough or are a no-show, they will stop asking.   It becomes a signal that you don’t want to nurture the relationship.   For me, if they are in my life to begin with, I do care and I want this person to know. Bottom-line â€" I want to help you accelerate your career â€" to achieve what you want by connecting you with your Free Instant Access to my 4 Building Blocks to Relationships eBookâ€" the backbone to your Networking success and fantastic work relationships.   Grab yours by visiting: CLICK HERE Brought to you by Dorothy Tannahill-Moran â€" dedicated to unleash your professional potential.

The 7 Universal Laws of Networking - Introvert Whisperer

Introvert Whisperer / The 7 Universal Laws of Networking - Introvert Whisperer The 7 Universal Laws of Networking As an Introvert Leader, your ability to network and forge relationships will be key to your upward trajectory.  A good way to gauge how well you’ve done in this area is to think about how many people you could call for referrals inside other companies.  Arg!  Kind of hits home for you?  Not feeling so good about this area?   At some point, your job opportunities will be directly linked to how well your network ties are.   Waiting to develop these relationships is like using the lottery as your retirement strategy.  It might work but don’t count on it.   A great place to get started is by first understanding the Universal Laws of Networking:   Law 1 â€"  All relationships are 80/20. People are inherently lazy about the development and maintenance of relationships.  That means you may put in much more effort in terms of contacting the other person than they will.  You’d think all great relationships are about even in terms of maintenance but they don’t tend to be.  If you simply approach it with that in mind,,the other person will love you for your efforts.   Law 2 â€" Find common ground. The basis for all relationships is having something in common.  For people you work with, the obvious connection is your place of business.  You may have to dig deeper with other non-work people.  I find that talking food and great eating experiences can create common ground.  If you met the person in a group setting, there may be that as your shared interest.   Law 3 â€"  Be interested. I read something when I was growing up that a sign of a good conversationalist is when you ask the other person questions about them.  Talking about you is always seriously fun!  Show you’re interested by asking them about them.   Law 4 â€" Look good. OK, I put that in here just to see if you’re paying attention.  Of course, we all look marvelous!   Law 5 â€" Connect them with others. The best networkers and relationship rock stars are the ones that connect their network to each other.  This is not random introductions but people that can make a difference to the career or life of another.  I know a gal that is routinely introducing me to someone through email because she thinks we would be mutually beneficial.  Those introductions can be anywhere from a business referral to simply a cool person she thinks I’d like to know.   Law 6  â€" Every contact has value. You may not know it at first or even second blush but every one you come in contact with is good for you to know.  You may have to dig a while before you understand why.   Law 7 â€" Them first, you second. When we approach our relationships with others by first understanding how we can help them or support them, your network will flourish.  Think of how irritated you get when you know someone is talking to you simply to use you or ask you for something.  No one likes to be used.  This is the most important law of them all.  You will be the lovable, fuzz-ball that is irresistible to everyone.  Go for it!   We so often think that if we only learn one more “hard” skill our career will soar.  While those skills are always great to learn, your skill with people will be the single biggest success factor in your career. Do you know what your next career step is?   Many people don’t. I want to help you accelerate your career by connecting you with your Free Instant Access to my eBook on how to construct your Career SMART Goals â€" that will help you put together your actions and keep you accountable.   Get your copy now and start your action plan today: CLICK HERE Brought to you by Dorothy Tannahill-Moran â€" dedicated to unleash your professional potential.